Now, I'm Pissed

OK, I haven't been reviewing lately. I haven't really read much that has made me stand up and go "WOW" (well, maybe one or two things) or anything that has pissed me off enough to throw it across the room...

Until now.

I've been slogging through a lot, and I mean A LOT of the paranormal chic books. You know the ones I'm talking about. The vamp bounty hunter books, the shifter books, the basically "Well Laurell K and Buffy are so popular, let's publish all these others and see if we can get rich" books. I got to the point where some one would mention on of these series and I couldn't remember if I read them or not, so I'm basically in the process of making a road map of them.

So, here I am, recovering from a migraine, reading my newest random pick, Mona Lisa Awakening by Sunny (yeah, yeah, the singular author name really should have been a clue). It got decent reviews in Romatic Times and is PLASTERED with "if you like Laurell K and Anne Bishop you'll love this". Not that this is huge praise these days. Just about every paranormal book with a female main character now is marketed as "if you like Laurell you love" but I like Anne Bishop and most folks don't pay much attention to her.

So, what do I find? A book that is based up on the concept of another race/species separate from human (I won't even get into that they're from the moon) that centers on males serving Queens. Gosh, that sounds so much like my favorite series The Black Jewels, but I'll read a bit more, and reserve judgement. Turns out, the main character is a Queen and gee, also a healer. Wow, that sounds just like the main character from Black Jewels. And we meet another Queen named Janelle, who is the chief healer of these "mooninites". Alright, Janelle is sort of a popular fantasy name, I won't call foul just yet despite the fact THAT'S THE NAME OF THE MAIN CHARACTER IN THE BLACK JEWELS. And then we meet and very random side character named Tersa. Tersa? Not a common name at all. As a matter of fact I've only seen that name one other place. AS A VERY IMPORTANT CHARACTER IN BLACK JEWELS.

OH MY FUCKING GOD I'M READING FAN FICTION.

From Mona Lisa:

"We are drawn to Queens," Amber replied. "It is our nature to desire to serve you, protect you. We require your warmth, you presence, as much as you require our strength. She is the Queen I have dreamt all my life of serving."

From various passages in The Black Jewels Trilogy:

"Just once, I'd like to serve a Queen I could respect, someone I could truly believe in. A strong Queen who wouldn't fear my strength. A Queen I could also call a friend."

"For Blood males, the First Law is to honor, cherish and protect. The second is to serve. The third is to obey."

Jaenelle is referred to often as "Dreams Made Flesh" in The Black Jewels Trilogy.

So basically, we have the same social concept (not the same world or story because Mona Lisa takes place in our modern day world and the Black Jewels takes place in its own original fantasy world) , but Bishop writes far better.

And the dedications page finally got me:

"And special thanks to Laurell K. Hamilton and Anne Bishop, whose wonderful stories inspired my Monere Children of the Moon series."

Just because you thank someone, doesn't make it OK to steal their work. Fans of Laurell and Anne will not like this because they don't want the same story they've come to love stolen and poorly rewritten (That's why so many fans of LKH have already stopped buying her work.).

I can't believe this got published. It's nothing more than concepts, names, ideas and almost full phrases cobbled together from various LKH and Bishop work to make a very poorly written attempt at semi-erotica paranormal fiction. I say semi because it's chock full of queasy sex scenes, that can't decide if they want to be graphic/raunchy or romantic-euphemized and numerous near rapes. Just what I love in my erotica.

Edited to address severe flaws:

1. The Monere (mooninites) have been living on earth for 4 millenia, yet they have neither integrated themselves with humans, nor seem to know anything about them. One of the 150 year olds didn't know what cheese was.
2. They derive no joy or pleasure from mating with humans yet there are enough Mixed Bloods running around to require Queens to keep midwives on hand to dump unwanted mixed offspring off at local orphanges. And if therey're working in the damn sex industry, birth control anyone?
3. The Queens are TERRIFIED at the idea of one of their males going rogue and raping them, yet they seem to encourage that behavior in their society. There is no law against raping a Mixed Blood (they keep them around as servants) and folks just stand around and watch. Also atleast two of the Queens encouraged their males to rape other woman.
4. Halcyon, the demon dead High Prince of Hell. HE MAKES NO DAMN SENSE IN THE CONTEXT OF THIS BOOK. He only makes sense in the context of concepts swiped from the Black Jewels books, where the demon dead were explained and made sense and the High Lord of Hell, Saetan, played a main roll. Oh, and by the way, the physcal descriptions almost match.